From weddings to births to deaths, to farewells and to welcome homes, this new year has brought, and will continue to bring, many changes to our family. We started off the new year with the marriage of my brother-in-law, followed by the death of my beloved Abuelita. The latter was such a memorable experience I will never forget as it brought all eight of my grandparent's children together as well as most of the grand kids and great grand kids. We were able to stand around her as she passed to the next life and support my Grandpa as he struggled letting her go. Her body is now resting peacefully in her grave as she is in the spirit world surrounded by loved ones that anxiously were awaiting her arrival.

This year will continue to bring changes as we await the births of my sister Rachel's first born boy in less than two months. Then following, I will give birth to his cousin and little brother to our sweet little boy Antonio. We are so excited for both events to take place!

From now until August, we will be fervently praying for my Marine brother's safe return from Afghanistan only to then send my own husband overseas off to war in his place with the Army National Guard. We will continue to fervently pray that he will also return home safely to us so he may get to know his youngest son who he will have to be apart from for the first year or so of his life. I don't think things will really settle down in my own life until 2012 when Brevyn will have had a few months home and time time to adapt to the many changes that will have taken place in his own life.

All that said, I am grateful for my life. I have the greatest most supportive family. Though I'm not perfect and have made poor choices in my life, I know that I have been blessed for the right ones I have made. To be more specific, I'm happy that Brevyn and I made the right choices that brought us together. Though it's tough being a soldier's wife, I know he was the right decision. It's thanks to the Army that I even met him! But that's another long story for another day :)

The Awaited Update...Antonio's Birth

Well, it has been just over 7 months since I last updated my blog. On November 16th, I gave birth to an 8lb 15oz baby boy named Antonio LaVerl Johnson. He is named Antonio after my Grandpa Cuevas and LaVerl after Brevyn’s Grandpa Johnson, who I am sure, got the chance to send Tonio to earth!
It was probably about 4:15 in the morning on the 16th when I woke up to a painful contraction. I got up to go to the bathroom, and it was then that I was pretty sure that my water broke. About twenty minutes later it was pretty obvious it had broken and so Brevyn drove me to the hospital.
My whole pregnancy I was determined to go have him completely naturally, so I chose the room with the Jacuzzi, which I never actually used, and I tried to prepare myself for what was ahead. After ten hours of EXTREMELY intense labor, I decided I couldn’t handle it anymore, so I gave in and had an epidural…and that felt WONDERFUL! Well, actually getting it didn’t, but when it kicked in, the next four hours were a breeze. At 6:35, Antonio was born! I’m really glad I decided to have an epidural because he came out such a way that quite a bit of damage was done. I was oblivious to the almost hour long repairs being made by the Doctor and in heaven with my son in my arms and my husband at my side!
He’s been smiling since he was born and is now rolling all over the place and practicing his Army crawl in hopes to be like is Soldier Daddy. He loves to clap and yell “yaaay” as he does. Just yesterday he tried waving bye bye several times when leaving his Grandparents house.
He is so adorable and the greatest blessing in our lives!

Baby Shower for Baby Johnson

This is a picture of me and my best friend Camellia at my baby shower back in September. Thanks to everyone for your love and support! It was fun and I got to see a lot of people I hadn't see in a while.

One present that I got at the baby shower was from my sister Bekah. She's an amazing poet and writer...soon to be published author! I don't doubt her ability to get her book published when she is finished with it. Anyway, I wanted to post what she wrote for me. I am so excited for our baby boy to come soon!

To My Darling, Impregnated Sister:

In your eyes I see the characteristic sparkle of a mother-to-be.

Your smiles, your laughs,

The subconscious way you rest your hand, and your keys, and your phone,

On your belly.

He’s a part of you, that little boy,

And he will always be.

I’m excited to see him,

To watch him smile and laugh,

And call you Mommy,

To see him stick his grubby hands, and his toys, and his trash,

In your hand.

You glow, and it’s because you know,

That your life will never be the same.

It will be happier, fuller, richer.

Congratulations, Angela!!!

Good 'Ol Southern Cali

This is the Santa Monica Promenade. It's an outdoor mall in downtown Santa Monica, CA. It was where we spent some of our last vacation day. The rest of the day was spent on the beach, playing in the ocean's waves and trying not to think about all the many people who use it as a public restroom. I tried to stay clear of the green and yellow bubbles in the water.

We had such an awesome vacation. We stayed at the Travelodge in Pasadena and made sure we left a tip for the nice cleaning ladies every morning. We were able to go to the Rose Bowl, see the Walt Disney Concert Hall, (which was amazing), play and relax at Manhattan Beach, walk the Huntington Beach Pier, hang out in Santa Monica (where my mom was born), play at the Santa Monica Beach, shop, eat at nice restaurants, and just enjoy a vacation on the coast. We went with two great friends and had a freakin' sweet time :)

Well, it would have been nice to post a picture or two of us, but unfortunately while shopping at the previously mention Promenade, our camera was stolen :( Oh well I guess. We did what we could, from reporting it to a nearby police station and leaving our number at a nearby pawn shop. That, and Brevyn losing his nice pair of Oakleys in the ocean, were the only two unfortunate events of our vacation. Other than that, I was depressed when it was over because we had such a sweet time!

I Need Not Be Ashamed

Standing in line at the supermarket, five months pregnant, wearing black sweat shorts and a long white fitted shirt, I was feeling comfortable and content. I glanced behind me and noticed a middle aged man in line whispering something to his middle aged wife. I thought nothing of it until I saw the way she then looked at me. With an absolute disregard for the feelings of someone she'd never met or even seen before, she said out loud to her husband, clearly so I could hear, "When I was pregnant, we covered that kind of thing." Apparently there was no reason for her to be subtle as I was no one dear to her. All I have to say to all those who may have the same mentality as this woman, who seemingly was ashamed of being pregnant back in her day... I am 24 years old, I've been married for over a year, and I have absolutely no reason to be ashamed of the growing baby boy inside my belly. I refuse to walk around in a tent to hide such a great thing. So if that's how you feel, either don't say anything at all, or at least spare the feelings of others by mentioning it out of ear shot. If I had been anyone else, I may not have kept my mouth shut and ignored this old woman. I gave her more respect than she deserved.

Well, aside from grumpy old woman, weird things happening to my body such as my taste buds falling off but fortunately growing back, and falling down the stairs yesterday, being pregnant has been a pretty smooth process for me for the most part. Brevyn is the only one who's thrown up and so far I haven't had any sort of complications. I can only pray things will continue to go smoothly. I'm starting to have an achy back and I have had ligament and gas pains, but I hear my achiness will only get worse which is what's to be expected.

I am overjoyed with the thought of our little boy and love to feel him moving around inside me! On a spiritual side, it has been a definite uplift for me and I owe all my thanks to God!

And the verdict is...

Normally I dread Mondays knowing it's back to work for another week. However, this last weekend I was looking forward for the week to start because it was the week we'd find out if Baby Johnson was a boy or a girl! Monday came and I was feeling a bit under the weather and was hoping so bad that I wouldn't be sick on Tuesday. I went home and slept most of the day. Then Tuesday came around...Finally! My appointment was at 2:15, and Brevyn was going to come pick me up at 1:45. Well that time came around but he hadn't come yet. I then got a message on my phone from him telling me that he wasn't feeling well. To make a long story short, we almost changed it to next Tuesday the 8th, but instead moved it to 5:15. Brevyn spent that time resting and trying to throw up so he'd feel better.

The time came and I drove to pick him up since he was feeling very dizzy and nauseous. Walking into the Doctor's office I noticed he was VERY pale, and could tell that it was a matter of time before he lost his guts. As he sat there during the ultrasound, wearing a mask and rubbing sanitizer on his hands to avoid getting the very pregnant radiologist sick, he let me know that he was excited though he wasn't showing it. Well, after finding out that our child was developing normally and all was well, she pointed out that.....IT'S A BOY! That's right, it was unmistakeably a little boy part we saw in the ultrasound, which, by the way, will be covered by Blue Cross Blue Shield since we waited to have it done on July 1st. No wonder I've felt a lot of commotion going on in my belly! I've had an aggressive little boy in there! Talk about suspense waiting to find out. After we walked out of the office, Brevyn slowly headed straight toward a trash can and began puking his guts out. The least I could do was stand by his side facing away with my hand on his back. What a happy day! :)

We are both really excited! Most of the pregnancy we thought it was a girl, then only the last month did I start to think it was a boy and start calling it a he only to be corrected by Brevyn that it was a she. Well, that's that! I'll post our first baby pictures soon!

Insurance and Ethics

Apparently, I don't post enough :) This is for all those who are fooled into thinking I might have anything interesting to say. Well, here it goes.

First of all I'd like to thank Dictionary.com for the bit of information below that I thought would be interesting to include:

Insurance:

1. the act, system, or business of insuring property, life, one's person, etc., against loss or harm arising in specified contingencies, as fire, accident, death, disablement, or the like, in consideration of a payment proportionate to the risk involved.
2. coverage by contract in which one party agrees to indemnify or reimburse another for loss that occurs under the terms of the contract.
3. any means of guaranteeing against loss or harm: Taking vitamin C is viewed as an insurance against catching colds.

Ethics:

1. a system of moral principles: the ethics of a culture.
   
2. the rules of conduct recognized in respect to a particular class of human actions or a particular group, culture, etc.: medical ethics; Christian ethics.
   
3. moral principles, as of an individual: His ethics forbade betrayal of a confidence.
   
4. that branch of philosophy dealing with the values relating to human conduct, with respect to the rightness and wrongness of certain actions and to the goodness and badness of the motives and ends of such actions.
   

I recently got my husband and I into a mess that will affect us financially. Insurance should be something that gives you confidence. It's something to fall back on when the unexpected happens. However, like most everything in life, it comes with a price. So when my husband and I pay that price, I expect the insurance that brings confidence.

When we got pregnant, it was sooner than we had planned, not entirely unexpected, but we were confident we'd be able to handle it physically, emotionally, spiritually and last of all, financially. Financially because we were insured!

At the beginning of the year, I was added to my husband's excellent family plan. The amount deducted from his paychecks every two weeks went up, but we had no need to worry about the costs of having the baby because they would cover it. We were sure of that because we were paying the price.

Well, now things don't seem so "insured." My wise mom told me to keep a log of everything that has recently occurred concerning our insurance. So much for confidence!

Here is what I wrote:

June 18th: I called Blue Cross Blue Shield with questions about our maternity benefits. Considering they take money from Brevyn's paycheck every two weeks so that we can get the great benefits we do, and Brevyn is the primary provider for our family, it was assumed they were our Primary insurance. They asked me yesterday whether or not I was insured by anyone else. I was clueless to how Primary and Secondary insurances worked and in my ignorance I told them about our other insurance. I have had a basic insurance with Select Health since I got a job at Fibernet over a year and a half ago, back when I was single. I kept my insurance when I got married assuming it to be more of a benefit to be double insured, and never would I have thought that would be a mistake. Select Health was being paid for by my employer, but as it fell second in quality to the insurance my husband and I have been paying for out of his paychecks, and me being his spouse and listed on his family plan since the first of this year, which also increased our rates, I had every reason to use his instead of Select Health and every reason to assume, without entirely understanding Primary versus Secondary, that his was our Primary insurance.

June 19th: I spoke with Fibernet's Select Health representative, Irene, who returned my call after I'd called her with questions yesterday. I came to find out that deductibles with Select Health must be paid before they cover their 80% and then Blue Cross would cover the other 20%. Of course this plan would rate second when compared to Blue Cross which covers 100% with no deductibles. Who wouldn't assume Blue Cross would be the "Primary" Insurance. But of course I find out all this after the fact, and Blue Cross now has it in their system that they are my secondary insurance and Select Health is my primary. And as I understand it, Blue Cross will now probably back bill us the amount Select health would have charged us for our doctor's visits, and I find that to be entirely unethical. Therefore, I filled out the appropriate form to terminate our Select Health insurance which will take place July 1st. I rescheduled my ultrasound to July 1st to avoid being charged anything as Blue Cross should then be our Primary Insurance. I spoke with a Blue Cross representative, Debbie, who gave me some reassurance that we should be okay since they were the better insurance. She elaborated more and it wasn't in those words. However, I was still nervous because of what I'd been hearing contrary to what she'd explained and told her I'd be canceling with Select Health. She told me that I will need to send in a Certificate of Termination as proof that Select Health is no longer my Primary, which I never considered it to be in the first place.

As a side note, this would be reversed for my husband. Blue Cross Blue Shield would be his Primary insurance and Select Health his Secondary, and it would be more beneficial for us if my husband were to be the one having the baby. However, I see it as we are both having the baby. I am taking on the majority of the physical responsibilities as the women. I believe he has some physical responsibilities as well. We both will be taking on the emotional, spiritual, and financial responsibilities as the parents. As we are both on his insurance plan, we have EVERY right to use it as our primary plan for our family!

Perfect Timing and Tender Mercies

Brevyn went away to Wyoming this weekend for his two week AT with the National Guard. Not having been able to talk to him most of the weekend, I expected I wouldn't be able to at all while he was away. He warned me that they would be out in the middle of nowhere and he possibly would be unable to get service on his cell phone. I was having a hard time with this. I at least wanted to be able to talk to him, and I knew the two weeks he was away would be the two weeks the baby would develop more noticeably.
On Sunday I was noticing our baby moving inside me more than usual, but I still hadn't been able to feel anything by placing my hand on my tummy. That evening, the phone rang and surprisingly enough it was Brevyn. My mom handed me the phone and I ran into my parents bedroom and laid down on the bed to talk to him. He was standing on what is called a CAT (I think that's how it would be spelled) that they had driven to the top of a hill. He had to stay very still to be able to hold on to the call. As we were visiting, I felt subtle movement and placed my had where I felt it. Sure enough a moment later, I felt something push slightly against my hand. Brevyn had called at the perfect moment to be a part of me feeling the baby against my hand for the first time. As I shouted with excitement about this, the baby kept moving more and I was so happy to have Brevyn on the phone. He was sad he couldn't be there with me of course, but duty called.
I look at things that happen like this as tender mercies from the Lord. I have been blessed with many of those in my life, and this was yet another one.